Be Courageous - Stop the Abuse

Are you being verbally and emotionally abused and are you finally getting tired of it? NOW is the time to stop the abuse and take your power back.

1. Stop making excuses. If something feels bad, it usually is.

• We KNOW when something feels bad the same way we know when something feels good.
• We make excuses because we know that truly acknowledging our feelings would mean that we will have to make a change and we don’t feel ready to do that.
• But the truth is that you will never feel ready to change dysfunctional stuff.

2.  When you stop seeing yourself as a victim, you take your power back.

• Feeling victimized depletes you of your power and leaves you immobilized. You feel stuck and you are.
• Power is not bravado. It’s a little voice that says “you can do it.”
• Our inner voice whispers at first, but as we pay attention, the voice gets louder.

3. Being a victim is unattractive, to your Self as well as to others.

• Isn’t it amazing that the world is a reflection of how we “see it?”
• As a victim, you are unattractive to your Self; as a result, you are perceived that way by the world as well.
• Taking your power back means you do it anyway, when you are not ready, and the act of “doing it” makes you feel ready and empowered.

4. You can create a new life; just like you created this one.

• The process of healing demands that you take full responsibility for the life you have created.
• Know that just like you have created the life you have today, you can create something else going forward that is good and will nourish your soul.
• Fell the life you want, think about it, act on it.

5. Remember - Your future is your present projected forward.

• If you don’t like your life – Change it. You can do it.
• The only way to have something different than what you have today is to do different things.
• You need to put new things in the hopper to have new results.

Comments

[Judy]

I made excuses for his abusive comments. I bought into, "You're much too sensitive," or you have no sense of humor." I questioned my judgement, and I thought, "Maybe he's right. Maybe I'm too sensitive. Maybe he was kidding." I had heard it so often that after a while, I believed it. Strangely, the uncomfortable feeling, being the 'known,' felt safe. Even though it was a painful 'known', I hid behind it. The fear of the unknown felt worse, and kept me locked in. I say, 'locked in,' because in the last months that I was still there, I actually felt imprisoned. I was emotionally imprisoned. Even when I left, I was so used to putting his behavior 'comfort before mine,' that I would get waves of feeling guilty for leaving him. I felt as if I was abandoning him. Still, all about him. Living outside of the entrapment of that narcissistic person, with meditation (Guru-omm), and self exploration, I slowly understood that I had 'abandoned me' a very long time ago. Away from that relationship that had imprisoned my being, I'm able to rebuild my self respect and dignity. As Chandra has pointed out, you grow by facing your demons, not by sitting behind the wall of comfort. Yes, your world is a reflection of your own perception. But you do have the freedom of choice. I say, 'choose freedom.' I say, 'choose your reality.' Choose your Karma. Don't allow that choice to be made for you.

[Chandra Alexander, MSW]

Judy - You have found your voice and I am sure your awareness will help others to "get it". Once we do the hard work that is necessary to face reality, we are never the same. There are many more transformations in store for you, but this is a big one. You need to feel good about yourself. Good Job!!!