- There is magic to chemistry, a feeling of fitting with another person. It is based on how the other person smells, looks, feels. It is one of the few things in life we do not have to think about. (That, in and of itself, is a huge relief and something that feels good.)
Chemistry bypasses the brain – it is not about what you think, but what you feel.
- Thank God there is something that by passes the brain. Oftentimes clients come to me when things have gotten really bad. The first thing I say to them, “I know right now you don’t like her and she doesn’t like you and you are probably not being intimate with one another, but at one time, was the chemistry good?” If they say, “Not really, the chemistry was never really great.” I say, “OK, probably ready to call it a day”. But if they say, “Yes, at one time, the chemistry was really good”, I often feel there is a chance to re-build.
- Chemistry is the one thing I can’t touch, can’t make better. Either you have it with someone or you don’t. You can’t learn to have chemistry. We are hard-wired for chemistry, it is in our DNA.
It is a beginning and gives the go-ahead signal for another “date”. It lets you know this is worth another look.
- Chemistry alone can never go the distance but it is necessary for a second look. No matter how much money a person makes, when the lights go down, it is just the two of you, bare, without all the rationalizations (for no chemistry). Remember, it will not go the distance alone, but is essential for us to look further.
Its absence will always leave you feeling empty and wanting.
- It is a funny thing about chemistry. Even if we have never had it with someone, we know when we don’t have it? Have you ever thought about this? How do we know we don’t have something that we have never had? Ahhhh…that connection feels like home!!
It is the glue that holds it all together.
- Regardless of how wonderful your relationship might be, there are always times when you just don’t like the other person. After all, we are all different. What makes you want to re-connect with that person after you have been angry and distant? Once again, it is chemistry, that feeling that bypasses thinking and instantly connects you to another. When you have chemistry with your partner, you will often see him walking across the room and say to yourself, “I’m really angry at him, but if he’ll just be quiet and not say a word, and come over here and lie down next to me, I think I can get through this”.