Money Issues = Relationship Issues

Are money issues ruining your relationship?  If you have to ask your partner for whatever money you want or report how much you have spent or if you don’t really know the details of your finances, learn what it takes to become equal partners in money matters.

1. Money issues are not about money – they are about power.
   • When you do not have access to your own money, you do not have any power in the relationship.
   • Money and sex are the two key issues in most relationships.

2. Refuse to be treated like a child – Have your own access to money.
   • Do you have to “ask” for whatever money you have?  If so, you are being treated like a child.
   • Make sure you have one bank account that is just for you.  Set up your own personal bank account and put some money in it.  Make sure this is an account where you are not accountable to anyone.

3. How you set it up in the beginning is usually how it is.
   • What you set up at the beginning is what you get in the end. 
   • Money issues usually surface fairly quickly in a relationship.  Watch how the money is spent.  Is he generous?  Do you have to report what you spent? 

4. You need to value your contribution to the relationship – If you don’t, no one will.
   • Often at the beginning of a relationship, a division of labor is set up.  The man works and the woman stays home and takes care of the children.  Are these positions equal and do they merit equal access to joint funds? 

5. Know exactly what money and assets you have – Ask, if you don’t know.
   • Information is power.  Do you know what assets you have or have you left all that business to your partner?
   • If you do not now what you are entitled to, what you have, you can never be an equal partner in the relationship.

Comments

[James]

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